Wednesday, 9 October 2013

What If ... Book Of Death

What if there was a Book of Death, to accompany the Book of Life mentioned in the Bible?

Although the Book of Death gets no real mention in the Bible it is alluded to in Revelation:

"And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works. And death and hell were cast into the lake of fire. This is the second death. And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire." (KJV Rev 20:12-15)

As I said there is no real mention, but surely if other books were opened before the Book of Life maybe one of them was the Book of Death.

So, what is the Book of Death? The opposite of the Book of Life. Where the Book of Life records the names of every person who is destined to go to Heaven, the Book of Death records the names of all those who are destined to go to Hell. (The only reference I could find to a Book of Death was in The Book of Jubilees, where it is inferred that the Book of Death merely records the names of adversaries of God)

But what happens if your name appears in both by some 'clerical error'? I know all the God-fearing Christians are saying that God does not make errors so the question is pointless. God does make mistakes. Adam ate from the Tree of Knowledge even though God supposedly sees, and knows, everything. The earth was flooded because of all the sinners. Theoretically, if God was perfect there would have been no sin, or sinners, and the earth would not have needed flooding. Maybe the idea of a 'clerical error' is very unlikely but it is not an impossibility.

You arrive at the gates of Heaven, and St. Peter is there to greet you, and this is what happens:

St Peter: Welcome to Heaven, you'll love it here. But before you get to go in I just have to do a little paperwork.
You: OK. No problem. I'm sure it won't take too long.
St Peter: Not long at all. And even if it did not like you are in a rush or anything.
You: True. Well, what do you want to know?
St Peter: Nothing really. God knows everything already. I am just making sure nobody slips through the gaps.
You: Totally understandable. Don't want the riff-raff getting in by mistake.
St Peter:  I'll just check your name is in the Book of Life and you can go in.
You: I'm sure I am in there.
St Peter: Most likely, but let me just check. (Thumbs through the Book of Life) There you are.
You: Well, it was nice meeting you. I'll be going in now.
St Peter: Hold on. There is a note next to your name.
You: That doesn't sound too good.
St Peter: I'm sure it is nothing but let me see. (Reads) Seems your name is in the Book of Death.
You: What? There is a Book of Death?
St Peter: Oh yes. Book of Life for entry to Heaven, and the Book of Death for those who are to go to Hell.
You: But you found me in the Book of Life.
St Peter: Somehow you made it in to both books. I'm not sure how that happened. But I'm sure we can solve this problem quickly.
You: First thing you could do is forget my name is in the Book of Death.
St Peter: (Chuckling) If only it was that easy.
You: So what happens?
St Peter: How do you feel about tossing a coin to decide? Heads, you go to Heaven. Tails, you go to Hell.
You: I have to admit I am not totally comfortable with the idea. Seems a little bit too much to leave to the flip of a coin.
St Peter: Let me get my supervisor.
(God arrives, and him and St Peter discuss the matter)
God: I'm sorry about this.
You: No, no worries. I am sure this has happened before.
God: You are the first.
You: Oh.
God: I understand you turned down the coin toss?
You: Yes. Didn't seem right to leave something so important to the toss of a coin.
God: Totally understandable. I could let you in until we sort this matter out.
You: Sounds like a plan.
God: But if you end up going to Hell it breaks all the rules. You see Heaven is meant to be eternal. If you come in you never leave. Kind of like a spiritual mafia.
You: You could forget you let me in. Let me in now and then just forget about me.
God: (Chuckling) That is a good one. I'm like an elephant I forget nothing. To be honest the fact that Elephants never forget is because of me. I kind of modeled it on myself.
You: Surely there could be an exception?
God: I'd like to. But it is a slippery slope. Make one exception and then it is another, then another, and before you know it the whole of Heaven has gone to Hell, if you will excuse the pun.
You: So I have to go to Purgatory?
God: Just a Catholic thing unfortunately. And I see you are a Methodist.
You: So what happens?
God: Here's what we will do. I'm going to send you to Hell.
You: What?
God: Let me finish. I'll send you to Hell. And when this mess is sorted out if you are meant to be in Heaven you can transfer so to speak.
You: But Hell? I don't want to be seen as a troublemaker or anything, but isn't Hell eternal damnation?
God: Yes, but it is temporary for you. Well maybe.
You: But if Hell is eternal and Heaven is eternal why cannot I wait here instead of going to Hell to wait?
God: Ah I see what you are saying. You have a good point. Are you sure you wouldn't rather toss a coin.
You: I'd rather not. As you are God can't you just take my name out of the Book of Death?
God: (Laughing out loud) Why didn't I think of that? After all they are my books. I'll just take your name out. There you go.
St Peter: (Interrupting) Excuse me God, but you took their name out of the wrong book. That is the Book of Life you just erased their name from.
God: Really? Oops. Well the problem is solved.
You: Solved? I'm going to Hell.
God: It would appear so.

Life is not fair and it would appear neither is Heaven. But that is only if there is a Heaven, or a Hell, and a couple of books. It all comes down to what you believe and have faith in.

1 comment:

  1. Shrewd!!! Profundity wrapped with humor… pretty much the most delicious coating I can think of. A blog post seemingly easy to digest but about midway through the gyri of the brain questions arise… Questions like: How come Christianity has become the largest religion in the world and not one of the more cheerful alternatives? One equipped with a moral code but where the concept of sin in the Christian sense is unknown. Wouldn’t that make life much more pleasant and neither “YOU” nor me had to fear a coin toss at the end?


Thank you for your comment. Please note that all comments are not moderated and as such are not the responsibility of this blog; or its author.