Friday, 24 April 2015

Are You Scared?

Remember, back in the day, when you was a complete and utter pain in the arse at school it meant you got a trip to the Headmaster's office, and felt the cane a few times until you eventually learned that it was easier just to skip school. But now, act up in class, and you get sent to some psychologist's office and diagnosed with ADD (Attention Deficit Disorder), ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) or ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder), and the school will then make a lot of changes and get you your own 'helper' within the classroom. And you will be a 'special' student.

But it isn't just in schools that things have gotten out of hand. Scared people have had so much time on their hands they have a phobia for practically anything.

In no particular order, the following are all real phobias:

Zemmiphobia, the fear of the great mole rat. Not just rats but the great mole rat. Luckily I wasn't even aware there was such an animal so I have no fear of it. But I suppose in the defence of this particular phobia if you are going to be scared of a rat, then the great mole rat is a good choice.

Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobia, the fear of the number 666. The sign of the beast scares the Hell out of Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobics the world over, but 667 is fine. And who the Hell thought up the term? 29 letters to say you are scared of 3 numbers. What about all the Hexakosioihexekontahexaphobics  who also suffer from Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia? Well to put it bluntly they are well and truly fucked. Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia is the fear of long words. Possibly the longest phobia is used to describe the fear of long words. Someone had to be laughing their arse off as they thought of that phobia.

Omphalophobia is the fear of belly buttons. I have to say I have never met anyone who has said they have a fear of belly buttons. I think God may have been a Omphalophobic but that is just a guess based on the fact that Adam and Eve would have had no belly button, doesn't necessarily say he feared them, more he just didn't need them.

Phobophobia is a fear of phobias. Yes, you can be scared of being scared. I'm not sure how that works to be honest. Is it possible to be scared of being scared? Surely if you are scared of being scared you are in fact scared, and no longer scared of being scared. It gets way too complex and I think most Phobophobiacs end up disappearing up their own arsehole.

Now, to tie this blog post up, we shall return to the start, and end with - Didaskaleinophobia, the fear of going to school. Because in theory if you are scared of going to school you really can't cause problems there.

For the full list of all possible phobias head on over to the Phobia List.

No comments:

Post a Comment

Thank you for your comment. Please note that all comments are not moderated and as such are not the responsibility of this blog; or its author.